Is he some primordial behemoth, hungry for destruction to a heavy metal beat?! Or some barbarous goth-industrial caricature from Hell's deepest comics page?! Perhaps it's a Harryhausen Cyclops with a taste for Big Band music, or a squid from outer space shakin' it to the Cramps! Today, he could be Hellboy, tomorrow, maybe Blackbeard...a week from now, Shakespeare's buffer brother Biff, sportin' a ticket to Sin City!
Look! He's coming this way! What manner of twisted, mundane-hostile FREAK walks among us?! BY ALL THE GODS, I ASK YOU, WHAT COULD HE POSSIBLY BE?!!!
In a nutshell, he's all of the above, an' nothin' in particular. Add booze an' coffee, shake well, an' treat accordingly.